miserywhip: (hair)
There's something very wrong with Orion.

I'll be taking a hiatus from things for awhile, don't expect me to be reliable ... anywhere, until I figure this out.
miserywhip: (casual)
I just said goodbye to .... my only actual in person, off the computer, live flesh and blood friend. He's going to London for a month, and I'm not sure he's ever left the state, nevermind the country alone.

Breathing. Okay.


I hate having to say goodbye to people when I don't actually see them leave, they just ... disappear. I hate it, it's one major flaw of the internet, you don't get to see people off. I'm very visual, very physical in that sense. When my brother left and we dropped him off at the airport it didn't bother me, I watched my mother and my sister sob and I was fine. When he left the night before he was leaving the second time. Disappeared to the void of my father's house and I could sit here and watch the clock and know, "Now is when he's sleeping. Now is when he's arriving at the airport. Now is when the plane takes off. Now is when he's probably landing." That shit destroys me.

I'm going to go back to pretending this doesn't bother me. Concern, especially for Antonio, ruins my cool indifferent image. Because ... everyone here that's seen me sob for months and melt down over nothing- you're all convinced I don't have emotions, right? Right?


The other thing I wanted to post about when I was here was that my brother changed the settings on my mom's computer so now everything is really tiny and far away looking on my desk top. He left a month ago, and I'm just noticing this now - can you tell how often I use that computer?

Also: Note to self. Moved Kip into Angel's cage, and Fucker into Kip's cage. Fed Fucker one large. Need to buy crickets for Kip.

Profile

miserywhip: (Default)
We're just learning how to smile, and that's not e

November 2015

S M T W T F S
1234567
891011121314
15161718192021
222324252627 28
2930     

Syndicate

RSS Atom

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Jul. 21st, 2017 08:33 am
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios