miserywhip: (pain)
I originally planned to stop posting to my journal, because I just- can not motivate myself to be here anymore. Most people on here get to see my freak outs in real time anyway, it makes Live Journal practically obsolete in my life, outside of checking up on the friends list of people I don't speak to so often.

Honestly there hasn't been much to update. I'm not really doing much outside of the usual, working and spending time online. The usual business. Only recently has anything remotely important happened in my life, and it's not a good change - so I've put off talking about it here.

So here is my sob story. )


Apr. 30th, 2010 11:29 pm
miserywhip: (pensive)
Another complication can occur when CSF drains more rapidly than it is produced by the choroid plexus, causing symptoms -listlessness, severe headaches, irritability, light sensitivity, auditory hyperesthesia (sound sensitivity), nausea, vomiting, dizziness, vertigo, migraines, seizures, a change in personality, weakness in the arms or legs, strabismus, and double vision - to appear when the patient is vertical. If the patient lies down, the symptoms usually vanish in a short amount of time.

Sounds like my life.

God, Panera you were supposed to give me fucking health insurance. Now I have to wait to apply for Masshealth again.

Oh, and this cracks me up. "Pediatric hydrocephalus may also be a heritable condition, and mainly affects males."

Since my mother told me that saying I don't want kids because of medical and genetic history was basically me making up excuses because my doctor told her that hydrocephalus isn't heritable, it's a fluke thing that just ... happened.
miserywhip: (Icarus)
Okay, so - good news. bad news.

My phone is really ridiculously fast, apparently. Good news, I wasn't really late this morning. Bad news. I had to stay like ten minutes longer than I expected to, so I was there for like 55 minutes instead of 45, which isn't a big deal at normal jobs. but when you're a crossing guard, standing outside in the freezing cold and only get paid for those 45 minutes.... yeah, ten minutes over isn't a big deal when you're working four or more hours. Most people come into those jobs fifteen minutes early anyway, but if you're fifteen minutes over on a crossing post, that's a full third of your shift more that you worked, that you're not getting paid for. It's all relative okay.

Good news. Called the vet. Got in on a recheck, $42.00. There are three thyroid tests. Good news, Orion has already taken one, and that one's been ruled out. Good news, one of the tests is $98.50. I can afford that. Assuming they don't throw any random curve balls at me. Bad news, the last, full and complete test is $251.00. A regular check up is $63.00, I don't know if they'd charge me a regular check up or a recheck to come in a third time and take the third test .... you know, in three months, when I can afford it. Bad news, this doesn't even touch on the possibility that it's not thyroid, but neurological, instead.

She asked which pet this was for, and I said Orion should be the only one on file. She asked about Sheba. Because I took Sheba in for an emergency visit in February of '08 when her gum swelled, which tells me that I did not get a reminder a year later for her to get another check up. She was given a physical while we were there, too but I guess that never made it into the paperwork. Nor did I get a physical reminder for Orion that year. I asked if I needed to inform them of her passing officially, mentioning that Orion came in shortly after and his vet was told. Her answer was that no, no - I'm not obligated to inform them, but she wanted to close her file so I don't get any reminders in the mail that I don't want to deal with. This conversation is a reminder. And those cute little 'you're due for a check up' post cards haven't been showing up in the past two years, so I think I'm covered on the whole ... not needing to deal with reminders.

I should just be grateful that it proved the point I've been trying to make since last August. Notifications haven't been coming, and they are still supposed to be. but, oh well whatever.

Assuming I don't die Thursday from working all Wednesday night, I'm going to sleep the entire day and be wide awake by 10 am Friday morning so that Orion can go to the vet. My life is so exciting.

This isn't even like ... take Orion to the vet to get his symptoms checked out. This is ... take Orion to the vet to get a test done that may or may not come back positive and may or may not be the issue, even if it does come back positive. I spent all night last night thinking about how a brain tumor might explain why he randomly bites me for petting his forehead - something I've done for six years, without incident before now.

I'm ... sure there's more, but I'm just not in the mood right now.

Also, I took a nap last night from 9:30 to midnight, and have been up ever since. So. Coherency ... may not be a strength, at the moment.
miserywhip: (Default)
I finally talked to the vet today. Ran Orion's symptoms by her, and the ones we initially dismissed as just part of ... how he is. Told her what information I found online over the weekend, since they were closed, and she said to call in the morning and make an appointment. She's going to list it as a re-visit since he was already tested for thyroid before, and she's going to run a more thorough thyroid test on him this time. I ... Need to talk to her in the morning, so that she can give me the thyroid tests they have available and the price range of those tests.

The other possibility seems to be neurological issues. Which is what I was afraid of. Which is what I'm terrified of - because if it's something wrong with his brain, how many options do I have? And will I be able to afford them? They don't just ... take care of your animal and bill you if you don't have the money, they will refuse to help him, if I can't pay for it. And after searching for someone who would just put Sheba down for cheap - I know that there isn't really anyone else around here that's any better.

So. That's that. I updated my schedule. I'm not even sure when I could fit an appointment in this week, since I work every day but Thursday, and I'm going to need to sleep all day Thursday after working 13 hours on Wednesday.

But I can't say no to hours, because I'm going to need the money to get Orion seen, tested and then treated for whatever is wrong with him.
miserywhip: (hair)
There's something very wrong with Orion.

I'll be taking a hiatus from things for awhile, don't expect me to be reliable ... anywhere, until I figure this out.


miserywhip: (Default)
We're just learning how to smile, and that's not e

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